I managed to lose the trail

after misinterpreting the sign

and not looking far enough

in every direction, which,

on any other day

would have been fine,

even fun, a chance to scout

around and explore more,

but not today, not

after waking up two hours early

with my heart trying to sledgehammer

its way out of my chest,

not after sobbing over breakfast,

then sobbing even harder in the car

when a radio story on gratitude

left me thinking that what

I’m most grateful for right now

is making it through the past

several months without completely

coming undone, and then sobbing

even harder when I realized I have

so much more than that

to be grateful for,  no,

today, instead

of an opportunity

for adventure, today

losing the trail only meant

I was lost.